August is National Toddler Month

Albany, NY—From nurturing a burgeoning brain to quelling an escalating tantrum, raising a toddler is one tough task. National Toddler Month is a time to honor the trials and triumphs of toddlers and the devoted, but ragged folks who love them the most—their parents.

“Toddlerhood is an intensely important time in the life of a child. It’s a time of rapid learning, brain development and physical growth”, said Christine S. Deyss, executive director of Prevent Child Abuse New York. “In dealing with toddlers, knowledge is power: Knowing what to expect from your toddler and how to respond appropriately reduces household stress and enhances the connection between parent and child.”

Challenging behavior is a hallmark of toddlerhood. Here’s why:

Toddlers have a lot of energy. This is a period of rapid motor growth as they learn to walk, run, climb, throw and feed themselves.

Toddlers are naturally curious. They want to know how the world works, explore everything in their environment, and test how people respond to their behavior.

Toddlers lack impulse control. They are all action and little thought. They need guidance in areas such as safety, manners and empathy.

Toddlers get frustrated. They have a limited capacity to get their point across because their ability to communicate hasn’t caught up with their desire to communicate. Their lack of coordination and fine motor skills may cause frustration too.

Toddlers have tantrums. Rudimentary communication skills coupled with a lack of experience in dealing with emotions means toddlers are easily susceptible to fierce outbursts.

Toddlers crave independence. They want to practice their new skills such as getting dressed and self-feeding.

Toddlers are possessive. They want what they want now. “Mine!” is an oft-repeated declaration during the toddler years.

Now that we know why toddlers behave as they do, how should parents respond to them? Here are some useful tips for communicating and connecting with toddlers:

Use nonverbal communication. Nonverbal communication involves the feelings expressed through facial expressions, vocalizations, or the way you move or stand.

• Maintain eye contact when you express your feelings to your toddler. This tells them that they are important; it also encourages them to make eye contact with you. Be aware of your posture and position when talking with your toddler. Get down to her eye level. Kneel next to him or sit beside him to take away the intimidating difference in size and height.
• Your tone of voice may be the most powerful nonverbal tool of all. Keeping your voice calm, soothing, and soft helps toddlers feel safe and able to express themselves in return.
• Use facial expressions and touch. Simply rubbing a toddler’s back, smiling and winking, or tucking him into bed says, "I care about you."

Be a positive disciplinarian. Discipline teaches children what to expect and how to behave.

• Tell your toddler what to do instead of what not to do. Try “color on these papers” instead of “don’t color on the floor.”
• Catch your toddler doing something good and praise that behavior. Try “good asking” after your toddler politely asks for something, or “good walking” when they are holding your hand and walking beside you.
• Give warnings and then follow through. For example, "Food stays on our plate. If it goes on the floor, I will take it away" (the warning). If the warning needs to be repeated more than twice, take the plate away and end the meal (the consequence).

For more tips on child development and parenting please call the Parent Helpline at 1-800-342-7472 or visit our Tips for Parents pages.

Prevent Child Abuse New York is a 501 (c)(3) not-for-profit organization whose mission is to prevent child abuse in all its forms. Prevent Child Abuse New York works with communities across the state to prevent child abuse by: increasing public understanding of the problem and its solutions, serving as a resource for families and professionals, building a statewide network dedicated to prevention, and advocating for programs and policies to prevent child abuse. For more information, please call 1-800-CHILDREN or visit.www.preventchildabuseny.org.

 

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